Aug 25, 2010

The Poetry Bus Rumbles Forth Again!

This week, Chiccoreal is driving the Bus, asking us to extemporise on the First Thing We Think of When Waking, or the First Tune That Comes into Our Heads. (Mrs.Trellis has offered to award double points for combining both prompts into a single Musical Extravaganza.)

My morning tune is here, or here, or here.  It's well known and just right for adding Silly Words . . .

Waking with Music

I wake . . . to find my underpants have vanished.
Where can they be? (He'll look and see.)
And fur . . .ther, from the bedroom I've been banished.
Oh, woe is me! (Yes, woe is he!)
Last night . . . I set out early for some drinking,
but got home late. (Inviting fate!)
No doubt . . .  I knew what Dearest would be thinking.
She won't be told. (He's far too old!)

Chorus 1.
So I found she'd locked the bedroom door.
Cried "Try sleeping on the kitchen floor!"
It's such a shame, I'm not to blame,
the bus I hoped for never came!
Pleading was no use,
I just got more and more abuse.

So here . . . I lie, still half asleep and weary.
My back is sore. (There's worse in store!)
My eyes . . . all bloodshot, terminally bleary
feel full of grit. (He's full of s**t)
She would . . . n't even let me get my jarmies.
It's just not fair! (Why should she care?)
My fro . . . zen botty, legs and both my arm-ies
are in the nude! (How very rude!)

Chorus 2
To recap . . . my underpants have gone,
can't recall where last I had them on.
What's this I hear? She's drawing near!
"Goodmorning, Dear . . . why do you leer?"
"You've got them on your head again!"
"Why . . . so they are!  I can explain . . . ."


  1. Lol!What a lovely poem/song.
    This ought to be the funniest(and one of the best!)one I've read for this week's bus ride.I am ROFL.
    Oh and a special mention I loved the way you have broken those words, gives such a nice feel to the poem:)
    I learn a lot here, I do!:)

  2. Thank you, ET. I hope it fits to the Funicular Song. It does when I read it, but that might be because I've lived with the words and the song so long.I used to ride my push-bike with Funiculi Funicula going round in my head - so to speak!

    BTW, did you try the second of my links to "Funiculi, Funicula"? Just love the choir of children, and everybody enjoying themselves.

  3. I read it without the music at first, but it is so much better with ;) Nice and light bit of fun.

  4. As if you couldn't guess, I chose to sing along with the third option! LOL :)

  5. A.T . . it is a lyric to fit to the Funicular song, and without the music in your head it probably doesn't "scan" too well.

    Jinksy . . yes! I could have guessed!

    Rachel . . I promise you, you DO NOT want to hear FTSE singing! That's one of life's more dismal experiences.

  6. Great poem - not a pretty sight!! Thanks for visiting my blog. We have neighbouring cats who come and steal our cat's food, but he being very old just lets them. Nothing, but nothing puts them off.

  7. Funy, funny funny! I'm with Rachel on this, we demand to HEAR it!

  8. I can kind of visualise a big fat tenor singing this deadpan. Wickedly funny.

  9. Very FUNI(culi). One can't help wondering, is it autobiographical?

  10. Dominic . . . variations on the theme have been known!
    Peter G . . . . what an interesting thought. Pity Pavarotti is no longer available.
    TFE . . . . . . Thanks. But I invoke the 5th and shall remain silent!
    Heather. . . . Glad you could visit. (I just broke up yet another cat-scrap)

  11. Well there goes the Xmas present.I'm not having you walking around with a pair of Bondi speedos
    on your head!

  12. Dear Doctor FSTE: Oh the good Dr. was on the town! Did sound wonderful set to Funiculi Funicula! It was composed by Luigi Denza Lyrics by Peppino Turco Published 1880 to commemorate the opening of the first funicular cable car on Mount Vesuvius. (Wikipedia)Did you know that Strauss (the famous composer) was sued by the composer of this tune because Strauss thought the tune an old Italian folk song. Strauss was forced to pay him a royalty fee every time the Aus Italien was performed in public. Good for Denza/Turco; bad for Strauss!
    Your Ode a might fine ditty and I love Topo Gigo! Brought back old memories! Lovely! Fun-icula-stacular!

  13. Dear Dr. FSTE: thank you - that's great again!
    After the first cup of coffee I come to remember:

  14. Come to think of it, maybe this could be true, too?

  15. Thank you Chiccoreal. That's interesting. The only bit of your comment I knew was that the composer was called Denza.
    The children in the Pavarotti version just slay me. Such enthusiasm and obvious enjoyment! Happy I entertained you. Thanks again for the inspiring prompts.

    Britta . . now there's a little problem! Who's the Wild One? And whose Mother wouldn't like whom?

  16. Dear Dr. FTSE: as John Malcovich would say: "Make an educated guess!"

  17. Hilarious! Can't listen as am at work but I shall return later... with earphones, bwahahaha!

  18. Your commenters seem to thing this sort of thing - bordering on lewdness, with images of nudity and underwear fetishism - is funny. I do not. You do realize that by posting stuff like this you could be influencing the unformed minds and emerging sensibilities of the very young? Drinking. Bedrooms. Hangovers. Nudity. Domestic disharmony. The whole thing is a mish-mash of which you should be thoroughly ashamed.
    Further . . no doubt your reference to me on this and other posts, is some sort of perverted Bloggers "in joke." I am new to blogging, but be VERY SURE, Doctor, I will at once consult my solicitor to determine whether any of the deeply unfunny things you have said about me are a) libelous, or b) slanderous.

  19. Dear Mrs Trellis
    I do sympathsise with your plight having just received a comment on my latest poem that Doc FTSE was farting,impersonating a bass trombone throughout the entire musical performance of the 'Toreador Song'I shall also be consulting my solicitor and the Musicians Union.

    To my knowledge he has never been critical of your flatulence,lingerie,musical inclinations
    and performances in the eisteddfords.
    I do agree that his followers would be better served discussing Plato or Aristotle (not Onassis)or anything else Greek.
    Deepest sympathies
    If you learn to flatten yourself through a crack in the door you too can become Prime Minister of Australia!

  20. Rall . . . I'll need to pop back to your Blog to see exactly what was written. In the meantime, can either you or Mrs.Trellis tell me who composed the "Meow Duet" - which you can find on YouTube. Back soon. Mrs.T - sorry, no points if you know the answer. But Rall will get 50,000.

  21. Excellent, I felt strange stirrings as I read!

  22. Oh, two sorts of night-cap! In Germany we have a play - "Teekesselchen" - it is guessing homonominals.


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