Aug 15, 2010


. . .  for a bus ticket, prompted by the picture HERE


“You can’t see me!  I’m out of shot.
I’m a WiFi poet. I am not
in training for the Thames Boat Race
in that old punt. I like my Face
Book, Twitter . . all's grist to my mill.
Eight syllables per line. I will
throw off the pentametric yoke
that really has become a joke
in recent odes. But wait! ‘Ang on!
Go back . . that second line’s got nine!
And now I've lost my grip on rhyme!
That's it!  I’m rowin’ home.  Now, where
did I . . .  Yoohoo! . . . oars?  Are you there?
You're hiding! Stop your rowstick prank! 
Without you, on the river bank
I am self-stranded. Get a life
boat, quick. Wait! What’s that noise I hear?
A diesel engine drawing near!
What need have I of oars!  No fuss!
I’ll ride home on the Poetry Bus.”


  1. Gorgeous, Dr. FSTE,
    and although I found a few words with -ship, none of them were with a verb - very clever of you! So I abandon the Inter-Net and sulkily weave 'a magic WEB with colours gay'(NOT in Southend-on-Sea!): hark - I hear someone coming:

    From the bank and from the river
    He flashed into the crystal mirror,
    "Tirra lirra," by the river
    Sang Sir Lancelot.

    She left the web, she left the loom,
    She made three paces through the room,
    She saw the water-lily bloom,
    She saw the helmet and the plume,
    She look'd down to Camelot.
    Out flew the web and floated wide;
    The mirror crack'd from side to side;
    "The curse is come upon me," cried
    The Lady of Shalott.

    Oh - had her Lady-ship not chosen that battle-ship (sorry for that ;-), and chosen comrade-ship or friend-ship instead of loving his knight-ship (oh, a German mistake: you speek of knighthood, we of Ritterschaft)!
    Tirra lirra! Toodlepip!

  2. I like the delightful break in the lines
    "get a life
    boat quick!"
    Many a practising poet could do well to heed such advice, and get a life... or a life boat, should they be feeling all at sea!
    However, I'm sure you'd be adept at paddling your own canoe with or without row-sticks, if push came to shove. Keep taking the medicine, Doc... LOL :)

  3. Thank you for the laughter ringing through the Poetry Bus right now.

  4. Britta . . I love the idea of "abandonship" as an abstract noun, like "kinship" or "citizenship." So when someone ends a friendship, you can say "I'm suffering from abandonship."

    J . . . that break was forced upon me! Ran out of syllables after "life" HeHe!

    Enchanted Oak . . . thank you for the opportunity, and the idea arising from the little boat with no rowlocks, oars, paddles or crew. How to make it go? Ah . . I know! It's for drifters!

  5. Dear Dr. FTSE: This is really a challenge well met as groomed oarsman of the mighty Thames. And watch out for that trawler! 8 syllables you did well and cohesive at that! What's a WiFi poet? You have internet cafe's on the River? How horribly quaint! Make mine a scotch with bitters!Got get on me wellies and give this bus a shot! Oh you already did that. What am I ever going to possibly write about? Oh...Grey Owl he was a brit who thought like an Owl and maybe I could too. WhoWho...No that's Harry Potter's owl and that's been done too. Dang!Fun OTPB volley~!

  6. ROFL! Wonderful
    "Go back . . that second line’s got nine!
    And now I've lost my grip on rhyme!
    That's it! I’m rowin’ home. Now, where
    did I . . . Yoohoo! . . . oars? Are you there?
    You're hiding! Stop your rowstick prank! "
    Riding with you in a boat has got to be fun. Thanks for starting my day off with such a laugh :)

  7. Gwei Mui . . thanks muchly! I'm happy I made you laugh . . although I have been "ticked off" in poetry readings for being less than serious!
    Not-so-funny poems HERE

    Chiccoreal . . . You have it! A WiFi poet is one who takes his PC to the river bank hoping there will be a signal strong enough to write by. I hope to see you on the Poetry Bus as a passenger very soon.

    Britta . . . good to meet you here again. You inspire me to read the whole of "The Lady . . . "

  8. Great stuff doc!
    Particularly liked all the hanging words following on in the next line. A much needed bit of lightness on the bus!

  9. Brilliant. Clever. Cool.
    Glad you're on the Bus!

  10. Haha! I really really enjoy your poems and I come here again and again and read them just for the fun of it!
    "And now I've lost my grip on rhyme!" i never even once felt that you lost it on rhyme.
    You do some great things with words :D

  11. Niamh B. Thank you. The words might not have hung if the lines hadn't run out of syllables. (Eh? Doc . . would you mind explaining that?)

    Titus. Somedays I'm surprised they let me buy a ticket . . .

    Erratic Thoughts. Thank you. It's good to know the poem made people smile.

    I'll visit all your blogs v.soon.

  12. You have fulfilled my laugh quota for the day, maybe the week! This is priceless.

  13. Thank you, Helen. You'll find a link to more serious poems in the left sidebar.

  14. I really like this, love the slightly scatty sprawling trail of conciousness way about it. Just imgagine an actual poetry bus ride... cool!

  15. NanU and watercats . . we aim to please! Thanks. Some say "Good Old Doc FTSE!" Others tell the truth . . .

  16. Very clever and funny. Damn diesel engines.

  17. Thank you . . . don't be too hard on diesels. Without The Bus I could have been stranded yet . . never did find the oars . . .

  18. Yahoo!! I loved it, FTSE! Rumbacious!

  19. TFE . . . Best thanks! I look forward to the next Bus Trip.


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