Jan 17, 2012

Magpie Tales#100

This week, Tess's sets her prompt in stone.

Ooops!


Humpback:  "You look miserable. What's up?"
The Sculpt:  "Go away.  Leave me alone."
Humpback:  "You look like you lost a chest of dubloons and found a rusty anchor."
The Sculpt:  "Please. Leave me in peace..."  (Sobs)
Humpback:  "Now this won't do at all. Tears are lost in salt water.  Just tell old Humph all about it. A trouble shared and all that."
The Sculpt:   (Sighs, then) "See, I could've been a contender."
Humpback:  "A contender?"
The Scuplt:  "There's plenty of me. Thirty tons for a guess. I could've been a contender for the really important stuff."
Humpback:  "Important stuff?"
The Sculpt:  "Yeah!  I could've been the head of the Colossus of Rhodes.  I could've been part of the Great Lighthouse at Alexandria.  Or the back-end of that wassname. In the desert."
Humpback:  "The Sphinx?"
The Sculpt:  "That's the one!  I could've topped out the Great Pyramid at Giza."
Humpback:  "Been a Pointyhead, eh?"
The Sculpt:  "This isn't funny. If you find this funny, just swan off!"
Humpback:  "Sorry, sorry. . . "
The Sculpt:  "But what I really wanted was to be Zeus at Olympia. If you chip enough of me away, I reckon I'd look like one of Zeus's ears. Instead of which..."
Humpback:  "You know what I think?  You're doing a more useful job than bein' part of some old  Wonder of the Ancient World.  And you could've ended up much worse off."
The Sculpt:  "What could be worse than sitting in the sea waiting to turn into a coral reef?"
Humpback:  "You could've ended up crushed to half-inch aggregate for a freeway in Montana.  Can't be many fates worse'n that. Corals are all sorts of lovely colours. Montana's just red sandstone. Boring."
The Sculpt:  "Never thought of that.  I end up covered in pretty colours, while you . . "
Humpback:  " . . . I collect barnacles."
The Sculpt:  "You just come along any time and scrape them off on me."
Humpback:  "That's the spirit.  Is that a little smile breakin' out on those stony features? I do think it is. I'll be off then."
The Sculpt:  "Stop by any time. Don't be a stranger. Mind how you go now!"
(Humpback circles the sculpt before swimming away. He swats the water with his tail flukes, which knocks the sculpt off her pedestal and . . )
Humpback:   "Oh SHIT!"
The Sculpt:   "You clumsy prat! Now look at me . .!"
Humpback:   "Sorry. Sorry. But look at it this way. Now you're like that other wassname in the desert."
The Sculpt:   "What other wassname, you idiot?"
Humpback:   "That King Ozymandias."(*)
The Sculpt:   "But he's a colossal wreck."
Humpback:   "Exactly."


(*)  Read all about it!




9 comments:

  1. Can't resist saying "Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"
    (Nothing personal though, Doc! LOL)

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  2. *groan*
    back end of the Sphinx....colossal wreck? Oooh my, lol

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  3. 'All is vanity' and 'Pride Comes Before A Fall' - I rest my case.

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  4. ...didn't realize until too late that she didn't have it so bad after all!

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  5. Loved it... another ride with Monty Python is possible!!!

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  6. Lol.........and all she wanted was a chance to voice her statue-tory rights, too!

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  7. I always say Oh Goody when I see that you have posted- and I am NEVER disappointed! Cheers!

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  8. Clever clever write...I've come to expect as much...

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