Oct 16, 2010

Magpie Tales#36

Words or Wisdom Revisited.
(thanks to Willow's weekly prompt)

Shutting half your stable door,
means half your horse has bolted.
Two "gal" legs on the stable floor,
but the "lop" legs have revolted.

Last night you had a one-horse horse
(Don't just stand there and glower!)
Saddle the half that you have left.
Ride forth at half horse-power.

"My Kingdom for just half a horse!(*)
So let's be on our way!"
The front half sotto voce said -
"Okay," Or was that "Neigh."?

And Lo!  The front legs work quite well,
(though its rump drags on the ground)
Bring Superglue to bind things up
when the back-legs half is found.

Follow those semihorse-shoe tracks
along the bosky path.
Count only hoofprints in matched pairs -
that doesn't need much math.

And while you hunt the missing legs
and wonder, "Why'd they want to
leave me thus?", the front legs say
"Perhaps they've joined the panto!"(**)

(*)  Arcane misquote from W.S's "Richard III"
(**) Pantomime horses always come in two halves


  1. So THAT'S how hobby horses originated!

  2. I add my hoarse laugh to the horse laugh hinted at within this tale of a tail - "It's behind ya!" - as the front legs might say to the back...

  3. ha. the is funny brilliant...some great one liners in there...very nice magpie!

  4. Oh my oh my, but you are clever, Dr. I know this sounds like one of those tossed-off comments that jsut can't be bothered to be properly complimentary, but it isn't, I swear. You ARE clever. Awfully. I can't imagine writing anything like this. Now I'm going off to look up 'bosky'.

  5. Deborah . . good to hear from you again. And thank you . . thank you all for your kind comments.

  6. Sharp, smart, sparkling, witty...

  7. Half-horse power, indeed! I love your brilliant silliness, Doc.

  8. That is really very funny. I love visiting your site.

  9. Unfortunately, I had my mortgage on that bloody horse - we are now living in a tent on a roundabout...

  10. I loved reading of your half a horse, that the half had already bolted.

  11. Love the half horse-power. Humorous write.

    Nicely done.

  12. lol hilarious. loved the half horse power and the Shakespeare reference.

  13. wow,
    one horse horse,
    semi0horse shoe....

    how brilliant it is,
    fantastic tale!

  14. bravo...does it tap dance for an encore?

  15. The Shakespeare misquote cracked me up!

  16. A brilliant funny read, well crafted and full of horse" non- sense.



  17. Oh glorious, Dr. FTSE! Suddenly I see a picture before my eyes I haven't thought of for - well, a while :-) - of half the horse of Baron von M√ľnchhausen, I think - the horse standing at a well and drinking - of course sputtering everything out in the middle - before the 'beginning'of the non-existing half.

  18. Dear Dr. FTSE: Definitely half a horse is better than none! Anon! No shat! We think alike in an odd kind of way! I should have remember my Mr. Ed! "A horse is a horse of course of course..." Why didnt I?

  19. Over from Rene's and this is fantastic! I'll be back...


  20. Thank you, one and all. As always, your comments are too kind . . . but I wonder . . . should you be encouraging me?
    A special word for Kraxpelax. I bow before your multilingualism. One day I will produce a Poetic Tribute to it. Further, I bow before your physics. Your postulates are quite beyond me. I'm stuck in the first 10exp(-34) seconds after the Big Bang!


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